A Little Priest - Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter

Seems a downright shame

Shame?

Seems an awful waste

Such a nice plump frame

What's his name has… had… has

Nor he can't be traced

Business needs a lift

Debts to be erased

Think of it as thrift

As a gift

If you get my drift

Seems an awful waste

I mean, with the price of meat

What it is

When you get it

If you get it

Ah!

Good, you got it

Take, for instance, Mrs. Mooney and her pie shop

Business never better, using only pussycats and toast

Now, a pussy's good for maybe six or seven at the most

And I'm sure they can't compare as far as taste

Mrs. Lovett

What a charming notion

Eminently practical

Well, it does seem a waste

And yet appropriate as always

Mrs. Lovett

How I've lived without you all these years

I'll never know

(Think about it)

How delectable

(Lots of other gentlemen'll soon be)

Also undetectable

(comin' for a shave

Won't they?)

How choice

(Think of)

How rare

(All them pies!)

For what's the sound of the world out there

What, Mr. Todd

What, Mr. Todd

What is that sound

Those crunching noises pervading the air

Yes, Mr. Todd!

Yes, Mr. Todd!

Yes, all around

It's man devouring man, my dear

Then who are we to deny it in here?

What is that?

It's priest

Have a little priest

Is it really good?

Sir, it's too good, at least!

Then again, they don't commit sins of the flesh

So it's pretty fresh

Awful lot of fat

Only where it sat

Haven't you got poet, or something like that?

No, y'see, the trouble with poet is

'Ow do you know it's deceased?

Try the priest!

Lawyer's rather nice

If it's for a price

Order something else, though, to follow

Since no one should swallow it twice!

Anything that's lean?

Well, then, if you're British and loyal

You might enjoy Royal Marine

Anyway, it's clean

Though of course, it tastes of wherever it's been!

Is that squire

On the fire?

Mercy no, sir, look closer

You'll notice it's grocer!

Looks thicker

More like vicar!

No, it has to be grocer

It's green!

The history of the world, my love

Save a lot of graves

Do a lot of relatives favors!

Is those below serving those up above!

Ev'rybody shaves

So there should be plenty of flavors!

How gratifying for once to know

That those above will serve those down below!

What is that?

It's fop

Finest in the shop

Or we have some shepherd's pie peppered

With actual shepherd on top!

And I've just begun

Here's the politician, so oily

It's served with a doily

Have one!

Put it on a bun.

Well, you never know if it's going to run!

Try the friar.

Fried, it's drier!

No, the clergy is really

Too coarse and too mealy!

Then actor

It's compacter!

Ah, but always arrives overdone!

I'll come again when you have judge on the menu

Have charity towards the world, my pet!

Yes, yes, I know, my love!

We'll take the customers that we can get!

High-born and low, my love!

We'll not discriminate great from small!

No, we'll serve anyone

Meaning anyone!

We'll serve anyone

And to anyone!

At all!