Constancy -

Fate decides this time I spend alone

And I know it’s not forever

So I keep to myself—my own little imperfection

Would I try to write my own way

Or trace the lines between the dots?

O' I wish I could forget everything!

To dig up all the seeds I had sown

All the dreams I had chased…

How I wanted to make this right!

But their buzzing dampened the way

The swarm was too loud

And was drowning the sound of my soul’s shrieks

How I just want to go back

And remove myself from others' lives!

Blow up the bridge—a bomb between you and me

Another could take my place

I want to be a nobody

I want to disappear

Your word’s only good when it’s not make-believe

It’s harder to reclaim a trust once it leaves

And harder to do so from behind the walls of a prison cell

But your arrow met its mark down the center

Splintered-fractured!

And dust was all that matched what you shot

From the quiver of your scorn

-Such bolts don’t belong here

How I just want to go back

And remove myself from others' lives!

Blow up the bridge—a bomb between you and me

Another could take my place

I want to be a nobody

I want to disappear

O' they took my lamb away!

And the wolf I was, how I howled resurgence!

And this chastened snare of pride and steel was a part of me

How I’d bite my own head off!

I was burning

I was weakened

What I felt’s below dismay

To inherit such stigma and peel back that shell

I don’t belong here

No one cried, «timber» when I fell

My roots were worn and dried

So I just fell…

I just fell apart

Were you ever even with me?

Did you ever even care?

-Another victim for the coward’s rage

If I went to the beginning

And I traced it back to here

Would I understand my flaws?

And what am I to do with this limiting, fail-safe rationale?

And who was I to prove?

Being the conqueror

I had vanquished all the petty, little thorns on the sidewalk

-Kept the concrete clear

And so time increased its pacing

Now too fast—I've grown afraid!

And what am I to do with my fear?

And how do I prevent these burning tears from falling out?

If I run from the truth, I’m only hiding from myself

But that reflection in the mirror?

That’s not the person I should see