Bang Away My Lulu - Roy Acuff

I wish I was a diamond upon my Lulu’s hand,

And every time she wiped her ass, I’d see the promised land,

Oh, Lordy.

Bang away, my Lulu;

bang away good and strong.

Oh, what’ll we do for a damn good screw when our Lulu’s dead and gone?

I wish I was the pee-pot, beneath my Lulu’s bed,

For every time she took a piss, I’d see her maidenhead,

Oh Lordy.

My Lulu had a baby.

She named it Sunny Jim.

She dropped it in the pee-pot to see if he could swim^

Oh, Lordy.

First it went to the bottom, and then it came to the top,

Then my Lulu got excited and grabbed it by the cock,

Oh, Lordy.

I wish I was a candle, within my Lulu’s room,

And every night at nine o’clock, I’d penetrate her womb,

Oh, Lordy.

My Lulu’s tall and sprightly.

My Lulu’s tall and thin.

I caught her by the railroad track jacking off with a coupling-pin,

Oh, Lordy.

I took her to the Poodle Dog, upon the seventh floor.

And there I gave her seventeen raps and still she called for more,

Oh, Lordy.

My Lulu was arrested;

ten dollars was the fine.

She said to the judge, «Take it out of this ass of mine,

Oh, Lordy.»

Sometimes I got a nickel and sometimes I got a dime,

But when I got a quarter, Lulu lays it on the line,

Oh, Lordy.

Pappy loved my mammy;

mammy loved the men.

Now mammy’s full of buckshot and pappy’s in the pen,

Oh, Lordy.

Lulu got religion;

she had it once before.

She prayed to Christ with the minister while they did it on the floor,

Oh, Lordy.

My Lulu went to Boston, and there she met a trucker,

She high-balled to the bedroom cryin', «Double-clutch me,

Mother-fucker.»

My Lulu had a sister who lived up on a hill.

If she hadn’t died of syphilis, we’d be banging still,

Oh, Lordy.

Some girls work in offices;

some girls work in stores,

But Lulu works in a hotel with forty other whores.

Oh, Lordy.