RedStripeInTheAM - Shane Reis, Essence, Renée Coolbrith

I just gotta stay busy

I see the devil work and know the pay’s shitty

The light rays flicker deep in the caves in me

He waves to me and, hey

I’m cold hearted maybe he could heat the grave for me

«I'm never working» is not something you could say to me

I’ve been gone so much it’s like they went and rearranged the city

Been in my bubble but it’s troubling, too

'Cause all the work I do ain’t on a W2

It’s like a hoodie over the tee the way I cover the crew

But every other shift they calling out, that’s how they’re covering you

It’s how they’re covering me, and look

I don’t normally drink but get a double for me

'Cause I’ve been so on top of shit, I’m never under the sheets

Why is trying to get a piece of you always puzzling me?

It should be easy, no?

Sometimes the toughest way’s the easy road

I gotta eat and I’m only full if you feed me though

I’m writin' you but can’t enlighten less you read it though

It’s like I paid for the tickets, but didn’t get to see the show

(But didn’t get to see the show)

But it’s in my dark times that I delete the archives

And still pump the blood through my body when my heart dies

I heard the apology, it’s a wonderful speech

I’d rather breathe

I’d rather watch the sun set on the stream

And pretend you’re the same version of you I left in my dreams

'Cause away, where I land with you is where you’re coming with me

I know it’s never been like that, but where’s the comfort for me

When reaching out to you is like huggin' a breeze?

And I could meet you halfway

But let me out the past, babe

'Cause I swam through the lagoons and dove off the cascades

I double timed to ya, I fell a love a couple times wit’cha

And went through all of them troubled times wit’cha

This was just another drive I tried to show some signs to ya

But I fell under the radar, somebody asked me how I knew ya, I said

Somebody asked me how I knew ya, I said

«I like it warm, but it’s best cold»

You should see it shine through the threshold

Sometimes the best stories never get told

And nothing beats that feeling when you finally get home

But there’s exceptions

Like when you step in

And realize that there’s nothing left where you left it

It’s just a bunch of walls with the standard dimensions

And a half a wine bottle and a glass that needs rinsin'

The 2020 vision, but up close it looks different

Because at an arm’s reach, two hearts could be distant

By any means

By any means

Oh, oh, won’t you settle in

No matter what you’re battling

We can get you to rise and shine

Oh, oh, once that settles in

You can watch me battling

And it means you can watch me rise

Yo, I don’t know, but lyrically, I’ll be steering you

If you want that honestly then all of me is here for you

I write in ways where right away, you know you hear the truth

And I will light the way 'till night is day and what you hear is proof

I fall in love with people who can’t sustain this shit

So I won’t find myself in a monogamous relationship

Fuck who you want and you can trust that I’m okay with it

I won’t have to stay in it, I may just even pray you split

Don’t get it twisted, it’s a cycle and I’m breaking it

Know that I’m a rifle, I get spiteful and abrasive quick

Passive aggressive not possessive walk away from shit

Act like I don’t care until it tears you like a razor slit

I’m not okay with it, I’m changing it, I make it known

I’m opaque, you’d lay awake with just my naked soul

With us, let you lust, let you take control

Say it’s not enough, fuck it up, trust I’ll make it home

I’ve been divided by attention

I wanna love the people who don’t bide for my attention

I wanna love the safety of people who can’t embrace me

And people too scared to have me and people too scared to chase me

I wanna get to that love you so much you hate me

Touch me so much you break me like fuck it just please awake me

I know it’s painful, but the high is where you take me

And the eyes in which forsake me are so vibrant in their aching

The most violent girl fire in the making

Provide me with a storm until my irises are shaking

I love the vulnerability

I dig into you well 'till I’m so low that you’re feeling me

And I could touch you at the bottom of it

And that connection, I can tell just how you wanna love it

How you’ve been hurt so bad that what you want is nothing

'Cause you’ll never have it, you’ll go mad until it’s all or nothing

And that’s what kills me the most

That you could live upon this earth and you could still be a ghost

So we still in your pulse

If there’s doctors all around then I could still be the glow

And I could still be the light

I could still be all the love because it kills me to fight

And I’ve been feeling alright

I rest my head up on a star like I’m feeling the night

And you could feel me tonight

I hope you fell me tonight

Oh, oh, won’t you settle in

No matter what you’re battling

We can get you to rise and shine

Oh, oh, once that settles in

You can watch me battling

And it means you can watch me rise