Paddy McGinty’s Goat - Val Doonican

Now Patrick McGinty, an Irishman of note

Fell into a fortune, so bought himself a goat

Say’s he, «Sure, of goat’s milk I mean to have my fill!»

But when he brought the Nanny home, he found it was a Bill

And now all the ladies who live in Killaloo

Are all wearing bustles like their mothers used to do

They each wear a bolster beneath the petticoat

And leave the rest to Providence and Paddy McGinty’s goat!

Missis Burke to her daughter said, «Listen, Mary Jane,

Now who was the man you were cuddling in the lane?

He’d long wiry whiskers all hanging from his chin.»

«Twas only Pat McGinty’s goat, «she answer’d with a grin

Then she went away from the village in disgrace

She came back with powder and paint upon her face

She’d rings on her fingers, and she wore a sable coat

And I’ll bet your life she didn’t get those from Paddy McGinty’s goat

Now Norah McCarthy the knot was going to tie

She washed all her trousseau and hung it out to dry

Along came the goat and he saw the bits of white:

He chewed up all her falderals, and on her wedding night:

«Oh turn out the light quick!»

she shouted out to Pat

For though l’m your bride, sure l’m not worth looking at

I’d got two of ev’rything, I told you when I wrote

But now I’ve won another naught through Paddy McGinty’s goat.'

Mickey Riley he went to the races t’other day

He won twenty dollars and shouted, «Hip Hooray!!»

He held up the note, shouting «Look what I’ve got!»

The goat came up and grabbed at it and swallowed all the lot

«He's eaten me banknote,» said Mickey, with the hump

They went for the doctor, he got a stomach pump

They pumped and they pumped for that twenty dollar note

But all they got was ninepence out of Paddy McGinty’s goat

Now old Paddy’s Goat had a wonderous appetite

And one day for breakfast he ate some dynamite

A big box of matches he swallowed all serene

And out he went and swallowed up a quart of paraffin

He sat by the fireside, he didn’t give a hang

Swallowed a spark and exploded and exploded with a bang

SO if you go to heaven you can bet the dollar note…

That the Angel with the whiskers on is Paddy McGinty’s Goat