The Ticket Inspector - Chance Waters

Silver teeth and the cockiness of James ____

body like a cantaloupe, head like a baked bean,

no gum but he gets pretty irate

So if you run then you better learn to fly, mate.

He spends his mornings tackling evaders,

and daydreaming that they shoot him a tazer,

And if he did then all the money here could save him,

With concession cards and bodies on the pavement.

And you might joke he takes his job too seriously.

But you don’t know all the things he’s seen,

there’s a lot of gum under those seats (and people’s feet)

And you might joke he takes his job too seriously.

But you don’t know all the things he’s seen,

there’s a lot of punks who ride for free (and ____)

But in high school,

he took two lessons in Jiu Jitsu,

and he was pretty good at it.

I guess.

Hey hey, please don’t go and,

go and throw your life away,

don’t you, don’t you run from him son, 'cause he’ll fuck up your

day,

No, he’s not gonna, waste his time taking your name.

Trust me, there’ll be no escape,

he’s got two feet and half a brain.

This dude’s like Paul Blart mall cop,

If he lost his segway and had a ____

Stop what you’re doing if you see him with his badge on,

Though Jane that the office got his name wrong,

He doesn’t have a baton, doesn’t need a mad dog,

doesn’t know a lot of stuff,

but he throws a fat punch, his mum packs his lunch,

taught him wrong from right.

Saving the world one ticket a time.

And you might joke he takes his job too seriously.

But you don’t know all the things he’s seen,

sometimes children ride for cheap (or talk lightly)

And you might joke he takes his job too seriously.

But you don’t know all the things he’s seen,

there’s a lot of bums up on these seats (and sometimes feet)

But in high school,

he was one of the members of the runner up for the 100 metre relay team.

He still polishes his medal.

Hey hey, please don’t go and,

go and throw your life away,

don’t you, don’t you run from him son, 'cause he’ll fuck up your

day,

No, he’s not gonna, waste his time taking your name.

Trust me, there’ll be no escape,

he’s got two feet and half a brain.

They wouldn’t let him the army (oh, no-o-o-o-oh)

They wouldn’t let him be a sergeant (oh, no-o-o-o-oh)

A fireman is far too hard a thing for him to be

He’d write parking tickets, but he does not like to read.

But in highschool,

he lost a jellybean count.

and then the winner didn’t share them

maybe that’s what this all stems from

Hey hey, please don’t go and,

go and throw your life away,

don’t you, don’t you run from him son, 'cause he’ll fuck up your

day,

No, he’s not gonna, waste his time taking your name.

Trust me, there’ll be no escape,

he’s got two feet and half a brain.

Hey hey, please don’t go and,

go and throw your life away,

don’t you, don’t you run from him son, 'cause he’ll fuck up your

day,

No, he’s not gonna, waste his time taking your name.

Trust me, there’ll be no escape,

he’s got two feet and half a brain.