D.I.V.O.R.C.E.F.G. - Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine

We step into the office where

The boss sits in an office chair

A hundred times a millionaire

Swiveling in his underwear

And on the lap of luxury

Sits some girl from the factory

Presented as a Christmas gift

They did the business in the lift

With his trousers round his ankles

And his fingers in the till

Everybody loves a scandal

And it helps to pay the bills

From the ashes of disaster grow

The roses of success and so

There beneath the mistletoe

They caught it all on video

And I thought I saw a princess begging

From the windows of a Double Decker

We all love a royal wedding

But a royal divorce is better

With their trousers round their ankles

And their fingers in the till

Everybody loves a scandal

And it helps to pay the bills, it’s easy

They say

If you put a monkey behind a typewriter

For about a million years

He’ll write the complete works of William Shakespeare

And then he’ll tell you a tale

Of how his love affair failed

With The Princess Of Wales

And the Americans will turn it into a mini series

With their trousers round their ankles

And their fingers in the till

Everybody loves a scandal

And it helps to pay the bills, it’s easy

As D.I.V.O.R.C.E.F.G