Last Last Fall - Jonwayne

I threw my old notebooks in the trash

Don’t want to turn that blue check into cash

So here comes the last hit, make it last

Make it last

Make it last

I’m tryna' figure out how you can love me

When I don’t even love myself baby

But if you want to find out, then we can see

We can see

We can see

When I first met you, I hit that panic button

I know that upsets you, I wasn’t capable of love

But really I was not prepared to be presentable I hated myself

And I knew that I could love you from the day you were dealt

It’s like we take the perfect day off the shelf

The only thing that stop me was that knowledge itself

Talkin' bout overnight oatmeal, take you out, In-N-Out

Small pockets, big promises, and bigger self doubt

Coulda' sworn that I was too foregone for someone like you

A sworn worn with big hearts, sharp, in sepia tone

Made a promise on my mattress I’m afford to adore you

That’s a ripple on my soul to difficult to ignore

Had to open up my core, as to shut doors

Standing in a quiet room young and corrupted, bug eyed and buggin'

Tuggin' strings just to hear notes, pianos, and my chest ringing out for the

day that I croak, then I’ll know

I threw my old notebooks in the trash

Don’t want to turn that blue check into cash

So here comes the last hit, make it last

Make it last

Make it last

I’m tryna' figure out how you can love me

When I don’t even love myself baby

But if you want to find out, then we can see

We can see

We can see

I haven’t been outside the crib since Christmas, chin checking myself myself

Rubbernecking, no flexin', just remembering my daddy’s a Texan

Need a break from these Best Westerns, I’ve been blessed with the room

discretion

Looking for a therapist, very apparent I’m scared of myself

In the nation of these white terrorists, is it too late?

I need to spread the love or get tossed off this earth like a discus

Working my mental fitness, she taught me how to love myself

To begin this, but I can’t pretend it’s not hard to keep pretendin'

Without her don’t know if these wheels will keep spinning, but new beginnings

and new ends

It took awhile to be a man, but dammit if that man didn’t sit me

Down and do to me what he damn well can, but I’mma sit you Down and do with us

till I can stand

Because I love you and I’m ready for you

Damn

I threw my old notebooks in the trash

Don’t want to turn that blue check into cash

So here comes the last hit, make it last

Make it last

Make it last

I’m tryna' figure out how you can love me

When I don’t even love myself baby

But if you want to find out, then we can see

We can see

We can see